


Notes to Dan

by dorvanie



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Depression, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, Friendship, Happy Ending, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Marriage Proposal, Romance, fluff with crying, this is a lot of fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-02
Updated: 2018-03-02
Packaged: 2019-03-25 21:17:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,466
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13843218
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dorvanie/pseuds/dorvanie
Summary: Phil decides he’s going to do something he’s been meaning to do for years, and poor Dan has no idea.





	Notes to Dan

**Author's Note:**

> *IMPORTANT* the things in italics are inner thoughts that Dan is having. There is also some talk about depression
> 
> I'm dorvanie on tumblr if you want to say hi
> 
> Also I’m not a great writer so I’m sorry if the flow isn’t wonderful. I just have a lot of feelings okay. Comments are always appreciated if you feel like leaving one!

Dan grabbed the last glass from the dishwasher and set it in the cabinet. Phil was next to him in his pajamas and his glasses and he was rinsing excess food off of their plates from dinner. They had started doing the dishes together instead of taking turns and even if that meant Dan had to do them everyday, it was worth it to him because _honestly, spending time with Phil in this way was just so relaxing and sweet._

“did you get everything off the table? Dan asked.

“yeah I did daniel” Phil said in a way that was entirely too playful, but he just continued to scrape taco sauce off of his plate. _What was that about?_ He put the plate down and turned and looked at Dan with eyes that Dan, of course, knew were the eyes that meant Phil was up to something. “did you take the trash out?”

“no I was about to” Dan muttered

“you better danny boi” dan flipped around and stared at phil, who was now leaning against the counter and had a slight smile on his face for a brief second before snorting a laugh.

“are you... ordering me around?”

“maybe”

dan went to the trash to bag it up. _Honestly what has gotten into phil tonight? He only normally acts this way when he’s turned on, so maybe that’s what it is. Maybe phil has changed his mind about just cuddling and watching game of thrones and he wants to turn it up a notch. I’m not protesting._ Dan reached for the bin when he noticed a bright pink note attached to the side. He tentatively pulled it off and opened it.

 

Dear Dan,

I had this little pink post it left over from the pastel video. I forgot that I bought it lol! Now listen carefully, dan. I thought I’d start the journey here seeing as you are (self proclaimed) phil trash # 1. In all seriousness, you call yourself trash and garbage a lot, and I want to tell you that, to me, you are a treasure that I cherish everyday. Even though sticking this note to the bin may not have been the best way to illustrate this point, I still think I am a genius.

\- Phil

 

Dan walked over and stood in front of Phil and looked at him for a moment. _Okay this seems less like phil wants sexy time but maybe I’m wrong._ “whats this about, phil?”

“do you like it?” Phil said tenderly and looked at Dan. He suddenly had a look of nervousness in his big eyes. _I swear to fucking hell its been over 9 years and I still can’t with those eyes._

Dan looked down at the note briefly and reread it this time with a slight smile on his face “yeah I mean..it’s lovely?”  
Phil laughed but dan could tell he was apprehensive about something “okay well get ready dan” he tilted his head to the side and slightly up and grinned bcecuase thats Phil’s signature ‘I’m amazing and I know it’ face. He took Dan’s hand and led him in silence out of the kitchen and through the flat towards the stairs. The only sound was phil’s feet in his Thor socks shuffling on the floor as they walked. _Oh and also my heartbeat which I don’t think phil could hear._

“this is it. you’re finally going to murder me I knew it”

“shhhhhh dan”

They reached the door to dan’s ‘bedroom’ which is almost never used for sleeping because he always prefers sleeping in a certain someone’s bed more often than than his own. But, he still spends a great deal of time in here. It’s his little cave of relaxation when he needs time alone, his pit of despair when he just wants to think about everything, his work area when he edits all night, and it’s the place where he keeps mementos of things from his life. _Mostly phil related tbh._ Phil opened the door and led Dan inside behind him. Laying on his bed was a small wooden box that was opened so that all of its normal contents that dan had put into it in 2009 were visible, but on top of the tiny pile there was a light green post it note. Dan glanced over at Phil for a moment curiously who was looking back at him in a similar way. “I think there’s something new in the box” Phil said as he nodded in the direction of where it sat.

“Oh is there?” and a huge smile blossomed on Dan’s face as he chuckled and went to pick up the note carefully as not to knock something out of the dingy overflowing thing.

 

Dear Dan,

You know that as I’m taking you on this journey I HAD that I had to make some reference back to when we first met. Do you remember when I met you at the train station and you ran and wrapped your entire self around me? That will forever be in my Greatest Hugs of All Time book. I can call it GHOAT. Anyway I’m hoping you forgot that I got a bit too excited while you were hugging me. Your leg was the first to know. The thing I want you to know, Dan, is that after that first day I spent with you, I was already in love.

-Phil

Dan kept rereading the note. He felt his eyes go a bit blurry as tears started to well up. Remembering those early days was always emotional for both of them. He heard Phil walk over to him before he wiped it away. “you rat… what is going on tonight? Phil just smiled warmly. Dan leaned over and attempted to kiss him quickly but he failed as Phil was already pulling him towards the door with nothing but a mischievous grin that he was terrible at concealing.

“No questions Mr. Howell” They walked out and over towards Phil’s bedroom where he slowly led dan inside. On Phil’s bed there was a small pair of silver hoop earrings in a little Topman package. Attached to this package was, of course, a light blue post it. Dan let his hand slide out of Phil’s and wordlessly picked the note up.

 

Dear Daniel,

This one’s probably a bit less fun. Maybe its not less fun in the event that you found the others totally not fun. I thought they were. A while ago your depression started to really get the better of of you. You tried to stick it out for a bit but couldn’t. You told me about everything and how you felt so timidly as not to freak me out and it broke my heart for you. I would never ever judge for something like that. Honestly, I already knew. I was just waiting for you to tell me. And when you finally did I was glad because then I could help. I’m sure your meds did a lot of the heavy lifting but I like to think that laying with me in my bed every night and telling me what was going through your mind helped too. I am so fucking proud of you, Dan. You are so strong.

-Phil

Dan laid the note down, turned around, and wrapped his arms around Phil who was standing behind him. He buried his head in his neck and held him for a long time. “I still don’t know what this is all about but thank you for saying that. I love you.” Phil held his waist and rubbed his back.

“I love you too” Phil said and easily pulled back to look at Dan who was on the edge of tears again. He held his face for a moment before he gingerly leaned in and kissed Dan’s nose which made him giggle a little like it always did.

“Oh I almost forgot!” Dan grabbed the little package of earrings and looked at them. “I actually fucking love these let’s hope my ear hasn’t closed up already”

“I thought you would. Also people on twitter were talking about you wearing hoops so I was like aha” Phil laughed and laid his head over on Dan’s shoulder as he was opening the plastic and inspecting the earrings. Dan reached up and put one in and then the other. _...with possibly a slight amount of force_ , and Phil stood back to look at him. “you look extra.”

“shut up thank you” Before Dan could steal another kiss, Phil had gotten that excited look back in his eyes and twirled around and was leading dan out of the room again. “phiiiiiiii-iiiiil you do that on purpose! I want a kiss.” Dan whined.

Phil whipped around, tilted Dan’s chin up slightly since he was on the s first step of the stairs, and kissed his bottom lip slowly then pulled back and wordlessly continued leading them up the stairs. _........... cheeky motherfucker._

“Okay Dan, I think I have one more note I want to show you.” He stepped off the last flight of stairs in their apartment and then stepped swiftly over to the guest bathroom. He moved Dan inside. _Jesus phil._ “wait here for just a moment Dan and when I text you, come out to the balcony alright?”

“okay?” Phil grinned at him and quickly shut the door. Dan waited for a few minutes and he heard nothing. Phil would have usually tripped over something by now but it was utterly quiet. _Alright then well I am nervous. What if it’s a dog? Oh my fucking god if he got a dog and this is his way of telling me I will com-bust. No dan you idiot what has any of this had to do with a dog. it’s not a dog. omg. Watch him open the door and come in with a fucking shiba_ \- **bzzzz**

A text from Phil simply said “I’m ready for you now daniel”. Dan put his phone in his pocket and walked out of the room. He was actually nervous. I mean Phil has given him no explanation so far as to what all this has been leading up to and Phil is one creative person so Dan has a right to be a bit wary. He makes his way over to the sliding glass door of their balcony which is really nice. Dan was very excited when they saw this apartment when they were shopping for a new one because this one had a balcony. The old London flat didn’t. It wasn’t ginormous but there was room enough for- _woah._ Dan stepped outside and was amazed. Up until this point they hadn’t had a chance to decorate the outside space, but now it was covered in fairy lights, Phil had added a lot of plants, there were colorful sequined pillows on the outdoor couches, and there were about a hundred candles scattered about. _oh dear fire hazard._ Dan also noticed that Interrupted by Fireworks was playing faintly from a little speaker next to him. _oh man._ And of course a purple note was sitting on top of said speaker. _Where’s Phil?_

 

Dear Dan,

It’s an old song I know. But it still holds so many memories. I’ve shared so many memories with you. We’ve done so much together and we’ve been through so much. I hope you like the balcony. I promise i’ll water the plants! Also as you’re reading this, probably don’t move because you WILL knock a candle over. You know what’s weird? This is the last note which means it should be the most important, but I’m finding myself at a loss for words. Hmm… I guess I’ll let Phil of the future try to come up with some decent words now.

-Phil

Dan put down the note and as he was looking down at the table he glimpsed something out of the corner of his eye. He turned around and. _Fuck._ Phil was in a gorgeous black tux and he was kneeling right in front of Dan. His hands were lying on his knee and he was holding a little box. Dan just continued to stare down at him until his lip began to quiver. His hands came up to his face and he started sobbing. Before he knew it, a warm pair of arms were wrapped around him and pulled him tight. “I’m sorry..I’m ruining your..your moment” dan said between cries.

“hey hey it’s alright danny they’re all good moments with you!” Dan pulled back a little and just smiled at Phil. Then he started to laugh, which of course made Phil laugh until they were just a giggling mess in each other’s arms. “Okay Okay listen! I was in the middle of something Howell shh” 

Phil got back on one knee, took out the little blue box with one hand and took Dan’s hand in the other. Dan’s hand was shaking and Phil noticed. He gripped his hand tighter and smiled at him in the most loving way dan had ever seen. “I don’t think I know how to tell you how much I love you” Phil said as Dan held his eyes and let his tears roll freely “but I feel like you already know so maybe...it’s okay” Phil gently kissed dan’s hand and couldn’t help himself from laughing a bit.

“you romantic spork” Dan practically whimpered, since he was full on crying now. 

“dan...” Phil looked up into his eyes again and the laugh was gone. Phil was near tears but the absolute joy and sincerity behind his light blue eyes couldn’t be mistaken, especially not by Dan. “...will you marry me?” Dan let out a soft sob and was tugging at Phil’s hand until he was off his knee and in Dan’s arms. He buried his face in Phil’s neck and tried to stop himself from crying but _honestly it was to no avail._

He looked up at Phil after a moment and put his hands around his face. “yes of fucking course I will phil” Dan said in a voice that was low and completely vulnerable. It was the voice that phil knew was reserved for him in moments like these primarily. 

Phil beamed and laughed with his tongue sticking out ever so slightly and pulled Dan into a hug that could’ve lasted for the rest of their lives for all they cared. “That’s a relief I thought you were going to say no” 

Dan dissolved into laughter and hugged Phil tighter “As if, you spoon” Phil giggled and swayed with Dan just a bit as they stood there. “I love you phil”

Phil who was now crying said in a low voice “I love you so much dan”.


End file.
